an unusual opening up

There comes a time in a married man's life when the primary thing he has to focus on is simply being there for his wife. Yesterday, the wife and I received undoubtedly the worst news we have received in our time together. And that's what I've mostly been doing since then.

My wife and I are very good for each other. We are in many ways opposites, which helps us out. When things are going well, I'm usually wanting to surge forward without much thought, she's more likely to be the voice of reason and slow down. When going on a trip, she likes to at least plan a little bit, while I'm all for spontenaity. We're also very similar in ways - our personalities, despite these differences, are very much in tune. Neither of us is a morning person, neither of us are party animals. Given our druthers, we'd prefer to just chill out at home rather than go out unnecessarily.

But, when times of crisis arise, that is when my responsibility to the marriage particularly kicks in. My personality leads me to largely compartmentalize the pain, generally using an advanced tactic known as "not worrying about it." I'm generally a very happy person, on the whole, and I hate dwelling on downers. My wife, however, is much more emotional. Not that she's prone to drama or tears, but when bad news comes, she'll dwell on it. My job, over the past day and a half has been to let her mourn what could have been, but never really was, while at the same time being the voice of reason. We knew there was a chance this could happen. We know there's a chance that it'll happen again. It sucks, it hurts, but we can't change that. We need to accept it and move on.

Well, that's about enough opening up from me for a few months. Until then, I continue to be an enigma that I always have been...